We get lots of questions from readers and do our best to answer them on the blog. If you have a question for Laci, you can ask her here.
“im a virgin and i hate being one. how am i supposed to lose it? im 16 years old and im looking for a girl. i hate being a virgin and if i do have sex idk if the girl thinks i suck and if i have a small penis.”
Hey reader,
There is nothing wrong with being a virgin! There’s a lot of pressure, especially for guys, to have sex ASAP. Because of the expectation for guys to be macho and manly, they sometimes feel like they need to prove themselves by having sex. What this pressure ends up doing is stressing you out for no reason (*hinthint!*) and setting the stage for some unhealthy and unsatisfying sexual exchanges.
You will have sex at some point. It could be soon, it could be a little ways down the road. Try to be patient and eventually your time will come. In the meantime, if you feel sexually frustrated you might find some relief in masturbation. I also wouldn’t worry about your partner thinking you’re not good enough. Girls feel the same way too! (What if he thinks I’m ugly naked? What if he thinks my boobs look weird?) If you can, try to put your insecurities on the backburner so you can fully enjoy yourself. Even if your penis is smaller than average, size isn’t a very important factor in sexual pleasure. It’s like the saying goes: “it’s not about the size of the boat, it’s about the motion of the ocean”. You will still be able to help your partner feel awesomeeeee! 
~Laci
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There really is no need to rush and lose your virginity. I didn’t lose mine until I was 21! But I got the chance to do it with the woman of my dreams, and I hope she says yes in September(when I ask a certain question)
Some of the women I have come to know end up regretting having sex so early and so young. It goes both ways, Both sexes feel an enormous amount of social pressure to have sex ASAP. My advice? Be her friend looooong before you have sex.
Hi guys,
I’m telling my point of view, which is a bit opposing. I never wanted to have sex just for proving my manliness. It was only the girls who made me the urge for it. Of course, seeing anybody (much younger) being together with a love partner always makes one, who never had one, sadder, but of course if you don’t see them, they exist.
So, I would say, the pressure is made by the fact that these are years that you will never have again. You don’t want them to go to waste. For example, I never had such a social life that I wanted. But now I’m getting much closer to that anyway…
As for me, I am 25, and I still can’t claim myself completely out-of-virginity. I had a – sort of – intercourse only once, this year. We were drunk, and I didn’t even know the girl, but my friends know her well. I think this was a lesson for me.
“Be her friend looooong before you have sex.” Absolutely! But unfortunately I’m bad at being a friend.